What a weekend! The word that best describes it may be, "Whew!" Really it was a wonderful weekend, and we were able to do everything that we had planned on and more! I received my 20th treatment on Friday morning. At 12 Noon we were on our way to the Ontario Airport and off to Oklahoma City via Denver. We arrived in OKC on time at 9:09 PM. We went grocery shopping, and then Karen and Troop came by to say, "Hello!" Then we had a good nights rest in our own bed, which was wonderful! On Saturday morning we went to Troop's and Karen's to help get the children ready for Hannah Beth Bullard's wedding. Two of the little girls were in the wedding. A quick bite of lunch, and then to the wedding (which was beautiful and very unusual) and the reception. Afterwards we had dinner at Johnnie's with the Thomas Hills and the Bullards. Sunday morning to church at First Southern to see Scout Bullard (our youngest grandchild) dedicated and then to Western Hills Church. After church we had lunch with the elders and their wives. Dinner Sunday night with Kay's dad and the David Hills. Monday about 10:00 AM we went to the farm and ALL our children, grandchildren, our parents, my brother, and some friends (33 in all) came out for lunch, an afternoon of fishing, four-wheeling, playing, and dinner. Then home to pack and get ready to leave for CA. Monday, up and to the airport. We arrived at the Ontaio, CA Airport at 1:00 PM, and participated in a conference call with Retired Commandant of the Marine Corps, General Charles Krulak. He is a great advocate of Christian character and we have invited him to speak at the International Association of Character Cities Conference at Oklahoma City in September. He seems to be open and desirous of doing this if his schedule permits. Back to the apartment, shopping for some groceries, fix and eat dinner, and then to LLUMC for my 21st treatment. See what I mean? Whew!

The Bullard Family at the wedding of Hannah Beth and Derrick Garber.

The dedication of Scout Bullard to the Lord.

Scout's immediate family

Enjoying lunch with the grandchildren!
We are so grateful to our children, grandchildren, and everyone else that made this weekend possible. We were able to see and spend some time with all the family! What a blessing!

The Lord is good!

Received treatment 20 this morning!

We saw the nutritionist and the doctor yesterday. Everything seems fine. I was told to expect some "red" spot on my hips. "Suntan" from the radiation. I also learned that the proton radiation goes right through the hip joint. That is why I have experienced some pain (mild) right in the hip joint.

We also heard a presentation by a radiation physicist. We learn more and more as we go along. After seeing the presentation from the physicist, I was really happy to be at Loma Linda receiving proton beam treatments rather than X-ray.

Look at these statistics:
230,000 men will be diagnosed with proctate cancer this year!
One out of six men will have prostate cancer!
More men have prostate cancer than women have breast cancer.
Early detection and action produces the best cure rates.
PSA alone doesn't tell you anything.
PSA acceleration is more helpful.
PSA + DRE is even better and a must for men 45+
Biopsy is a must for high PSA, an accelerating PSA, and /or a positive DRE

I care about you and your prostate health! That is why I have included the above statistics and the following information in this posting. You may need this information later or you may know a man that has been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

We are learning more and more about the long term results and the side effects of various treatments. We see men first hand that have had other treatments, their cancer has returned, and they are at Loma Linda for salvage treatment.

As I learn more, research more, and talk to more men, I am beginning to wonder why anyone would choose RRP (radical prostatecomy). It is the most highly touted but I think that is because almost any surgeon can do the procedure with training and hospital previledges. In addition, it now costs about $100M to put in a proton beam radiation system, even so, MD Anderson will have one up and running in about a year!

RRP is basically useless if the cancer has escaped the prostate, and if it is contained, proton radiation is best and X-ray next best both for long term results, long term side effects, and quality of life afterwards.

For just a quick bit of research, paste the following url in your browser and look at Table 10.

http://www.oncolink.com/treatment/article.cfm?c=9&s=70&id=211

The Univ. of PA doesn't have a proton treatment center but they have researched proton treatments and punlished three reports. One covers how proton treatments work, one covers the history of proton treatments, and the last is the article above that compares proton treatment with X-rays and RRP. Their url is:

http://www.oncolink.com/treatment/treatment.cfm?c=9

If you have anny questions I would be happy to respond.
Contact me by email: tomhill@kimray.com

I have always heard that "perception was reality." My perception was that I would complete my treatments on July 11th unless I could get double treatments for one day and leave on the 8th. I have even talked to the doctors about getting five double treatments to try to leave a week early, on July 1st. They weren't too keen on that! Every plan we have made for our time here was predicated on the perception that I would finish on July 11th if I didn't do something about it. I planned my day and lived my life based on that perception.

Yesterday, a friend here who started the same day I did said he had checked and he thought we would be finished on July 1st. I didn't believe him. I had run the numbers, I had done the research, and I would finish on the 11th. That was my belief and my percepton.

I was wrong. Barring any unforseen events, I do finish on July 1st.

Life is like that. We have met some people here that have a perception about God that is different than what God has said about himself in the Bible. They live their life based on that perception of who God is. They have done their research, they have run the numbers, and they are sure that they are right! They are making plans and living their life here on earth based on their perception of who God is. They have staked their eternal life on that perception. Their perception is their reality.

But they are wrong, dead wrong, and potentially eternally wrong!

Our perception may be our reality, but our perception doesn't change reality. Just because we think God is some way doesn't make Him that. He is who He is, regardless of our perception. And we better find out who He is from His Word about Himself. The Bible.

The stakes are much higher than what happens tomorrow. The stakes are eternal! The stakes are, where will you spend eternity? My prayer is that if you don't know the true God of the Bible, or if you know someone that doesn't know the true God; if you or someone you know is living their life with the wrong perception; my prayer is that you would each come to know Him in all His glory!

If you would let me, I would love to visit with you about the true God of all eternity!

Today is a wonderful day! I started early with my treatment and then came home to get my emails and work on my computer. Well, my computer was asleep and wouldn't wake up! After consulting with the Mac expert at Kimray (my brother Richard), I was on the phone with the Apple service center in Costa Mesa, CA. After 25 minutes on hold and 20 minutes giving the service technician information about me and the computer (most of the computer questions I did not have answers to) and 20 minutes trying various "fixes," the service technician transferred me to a "product specialist." After trying a few of his suggestions, without success, he said, "I have never seen this problem before." He did try one more thing though and it worked! So, I am now back on-line and dealing with emails and other work.

Now why did I tell you all this? Because trials are a fact of life. Little ones (computers that don't work) are sometimes more frustrating than big ones (cancer). Not because they are more important, but because for some reason I feel I have some control over what I am doing about the cancer, and NONE over computers! :-)

And then reality sets in. I have no control over anything that happens! God is in control. It is not about me, it is about God! I only have control over my response to what happens. That is what the Christian walk is all about; learning to respond in a Christlike manner regardless of what happens. Well, I failed today! Lord help me tomorrow, because I know that life is full of little and big trials and more trials will come tomorrow.

You want to know another thing that puts things in perspective? (I'm glad you said, "Yes!") It is seeing my children, now grown, and my grandchildren, now growing, and knowing that how I respond has an impact on them! My life, my character, is important to them and to their future.

Consider the little girl in the picture below. Scout Bullard is our youngest grandchild. What grandparent would not want to give their grandchild every advantage to be successful, in a Godly way, in their life? I don't want to live a life that hinders her (or any of my 19 grandchildren for that matter.) Lord, I pray that you would complete the good work that you have started in me! Philippians 1:6


Scout Bullard at 6 months
PS: All 19 grandchildren are just as beautiful (see the sidebar picture). That is not our doing, they are God's creation and all God's creation is beautiful in His eyes, regardless of our prejudices! Our prayer is that they are always as beautiful on the inside as God created them on the outside!

I started to write an entry today that says, "I don't have anything to say today." Now that seems silly!!!!

Today was a great day! I had my usual dose of protons at 6:45 AM and then Kay and I spent 2 hours climbing the mountains behind the apartments. Then we spent about 4+ hours writing! It is good to finally get started!

Last week I posted the second part of a quotation from Rick Warren. After thinking about it, I thought it would be good to post it again with the first part.
People ask me, What is the purpose of life? 
And I respond, In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. 

We were made to last forever,
and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven.
One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be
the end of my body - but not the end of me. 
I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going
to spend trillions of years in eternity. 
This is the warm-up act, the dress rehearsal. 
God wants us to practice on earth what
we will do forever in eternity. 
We were made by God and for God, and until you figure
that out, life isn't going to make sense. 

Life is a series of problems:
Either you are in one now, you're just coming out
of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one. 
The reason for this is that God is more
interested in your character than your comfort.
God is more interested in making your life holy
than He is in making your life happy. 
We can be reasonably happy here on earth,
but that's not the goal of life. 
The goal is to grow in character, in Christ-likeness.

Rick Warren, Author
The Purpose Driven Life
I have told many people that I think one problem with our society is that we don't have a generational view of life. That is only partly right. Our view must extend beyond earthly generations. It must extend throughout all eternity! I want to have an eternal view of life! I want to live my life today in a way that best prepares me, not for tomorrow on this temporal earth, but for eternity with God. My prayer is that God would conform me and each of you to the character of Christ, and that we might be so obedient here on earth that we might be prepared to be used by Him throughout all eternity!

My intention is to just have one posting on weekends. It would cover events during Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. We had several things on the agenda this weekend.

Friday AM we had brunch with Gordon and Carrie Taylor in Diamond Bar, CA. We had a wonderful visit and would like to see them again before we leave.

Gordon and Carrie Taylor.
Saturday AM we walked 4 miles in the morning before it got too hot! It is up and down hills, Thomas you would be proud of us! I think that the mountain view was as clear as it has ever been when we started but within an hour, the yellow haze was back. It remained clearer than usual though!

Saturday night we went to the San Bernandino Symphony. They give free tickets to cancer patients and their caregivers at LLUMC so we took advantage of that. The Music Director and Conductor is Carlo Ponti, Jr., Sophia Loren's son and the word is that she frequently attends the symphony with her entourage. This was the last performance of the 76th season but she did not show up. Mr. Ponti and the orchestra was wonderful. We were not familiar with the selections but enjoyed the variety. The orchestra plays in a very old vauldville theater that is unbelievably ornate, but obviously very old and in need of some restoration. Still beautiful though! Dusty, I understand that it has a beautiful, old, vaudeville organ but we didn't hear it play.

The California Theater in San Bernandino
We were in the balcony, but great seats!
Sunday we went to church with Martha Greene at Voyagers in Irvine and then to lunch at Mimi's. I thought that was Martha's favorite place but I am beginning to think it is Kay's! (More so than The Checkerboard Cafe Lars! :-) Unfortunately Fred was in bed with a severe back problem, Lindsay was sick, and Allison plays in a praise group at another church so it was just the three of us. We have really enjoyed being close to Kay's sister and her family, I just hope we don't wear out our welcome!

We had another goal this weekend; to catch up on emails and sleep and then hit the ground running Monday morning! The emails are finished (well almost) and the sleep, ... well, ... maybe tonight. :-)

I know that MANY of you are praying for us daily and that is truly a blessing to us! Thank you!

Dear Family and Friends,

Today I officially completed one third of my treatments. Three weeks out of nine, fifteen treatments out of forty-four. The time has really flown by. I told Kay today that if the rest of the time goes as fast as the past three weeks, we will be home in about two more weeks!

I am grateful for your prayers, the Lord is good! We could wish that we were home, but I know that the Lord has Kay and I right where He wants us and we don't really want to be anywhere else!

The Lord is teaching us a lot while we are here.

First, we are learning that we are not indispensable! The world goes on and life continues in all areas without us. It is good sometimes to step back and see how little we have to do with anything. It is good to realize afresh that it is not about me and what I am doing, it is about the Lord and what He is doing.

Second, it is good to be reminded that the Lord has a purpose in everything and to praise Him and thank Him in every circumstance. Nothing can touch us unless it first goes through our Savior. We continually thank the Lord for the gift of prostate cancer and what we are learning about the Lord through it. We thank the Lord for the peace of mind that He has given in all of this and for the assurance that it is for our good.
Life is a series of problems:
Either you are in one now,
you're just coming out of one,
or you're getting ready to go into another one. 
The reason for this is that God is more
interested in your character than your comfort.
God is more interested in making your life holy
than He is in making your life happy. 
We can be reasonably happy here on earth,
but that's not the goal of life. 
The goal is to grow in character, in Christ-likeness.Rick Warren
Third, we are grateful for the people that the Lord has brought into our lives here. These include new friends, old friends, and family that we have been able to be with and be encouraged by and occasionally, in small ways, be an encouragement to.

And this has also been a great time for Kay and I to be together 24/7. I told her the other day that maybe this was practice for retirement! We have been married for 42 years and yet I am learning more every day about why I love her so much!

We are extremely grateful for the prayers and concerns of our friends and even strangers everywhere. We are grateful for our family and especially our children who have so faithfully carried on in our absence. We are grateful for the men and women at Kimray and associated with Kimray, they continue to do a great job serving each other and our customers. We are grateful for the dedicated staff at Character First! and the way they have moved forward in helping people around the world build character in their lives. And we are grateful for the Church at Western Hills and our family there that lifts us up in prayer and carries on the work that the Lord is doing there.

Thank you and we pray for you and for God's hand in your lives.

Blessings,
Tom and Kay

Tom McCormick went with me this morning to LLUMC for my treatment. He was able to go into Gantry 3 with me and get an explanation from Renato about what was happening. I thought it might be interesting for you to get his perspective on things.

I accompanied Tom to his treatment this morning. I met several other patients and they all speak highly of the Loma Linda Hospital and the proton treatment. The one characteristic I most noticed is something I didn't see or hear. The patients are not anxious about the treatment. The proton therapy does not make the patient sick. The other thing I noticed is the camaraderie of the men. They are in a club. They tell how glad they are to be here and not like their friend back home who is having a tough time with the conventional treatment.

Renato, the technician who gave the treatment, gave me the tour. I saw the first part of a treatment where they align the patient on the “bed.” I saw part of the atom splitter and the final guide magnets. What a good Hospital. Tom is in good hands here.

Tom and Betty left for OK at 2:30 PM today. We are so glad that they came to visit, we had a great time. If anyone else wants to come to CA and spend a few days we would love to have you. You know they say that it takes less faith to live in CA than in other places like OK. In CA you can see the air you breath! In any case, it is beautiful here, and we would love to have you.

God bless you.

12/44 and I am grateful to be here and alive and able to praise and worship the Lord one more day!

After my treatment this morning we jogged three miles and returned to the apartment for a conference call with Itzel Cabrera and the head of transportation for Mexico City. He wants to begin Character First! with ALL transportation employees in the largest city in the world! Pray that those in authority would make the right decision!

We then had brunch and left for Palm Springs. Our mission? To reach the top of San Jacinta Mountain, approximately 10,500 feet, and return before sundown. We have climbed the mountains behind the apartments several times to get in shape! It has been a rigorous schedule to prepare. Could we do it?

We did it! Fortunately they have a tram that travels to the top in 15 minutes!

After a wonderful afternoon in the San Jacinta National Forrest, we had dinner at The Blue Coyote Mexican Grill, wonderful food!

Pictures follow.


The tram will hold 88 people!


What an engineering feat!!


Passing at 6000 feet!


Dinner at The Blue Coyote with Tom and Betty.

Today I had my 11th treatment. Everything seems to be going well!

After my treatment I talked to another patient that was really upset. He is a dentist and about half way through his treatments. He had been with a friend this weekend that had a RPP two years ago and still has problems. He can't understand why doctors don't tell men about proton radiation therapy and at least give them a choice.

I am grateful to God for the way He allowed me to find out and that I can be here!

Lest you think (after seeing the last blog) that we are not working hard, I thought I would tell you (briefly) about our day and how hard our life here is. We left the apartment about 7:35 AM and drove 68 miles to Long Beach, it took 1 hour and 35 minutes. Then we had to wait and stand in line for a total of almost an hour. Then we had to ride in a boat on a choppy ocean for over an hour. Then, after just 5 hours, we had to ride the boat back another hour, drive back 68 miles in heavy traffic, and didn't get home until 8:30 PM! Whew! What a day!

Oh. What did we do for the five hours? Well...I guess a picture is worth a thousand words...so about four thousahd words follow with a short description.


Avalon Bay on Catalina Island.


Tom and Kay really relaxed!


Boats in the harbor at Avalon.



Main street in Avalon.

Now you know our secret! My treatment is at 6:45 AM, I am usually finished by 7:15 AM, and we try to get to bed about 9:00 PM. In between, well...we are just trying to make the best of our circumstances!

We love you all!

Another "fun" day with the McCormicks. We went to Big Bear Lake. Here are some more pictures.


We stopped for a picnic lunch beside the lake. The temperature was about 70 degrees compared to 92 degrees at the apartment.


Big Bear Lake was beautiful!
We drove all the way around it. What fun!



We had to stop and play in the snow!
Kay tried to get us all with snowballs.

Today was a "fun" day with the McCormicks. Thought I would just post some pictures.


We started with a hike up the mountains.
This is a look back at the apartments.


This is a view of the Loma Linda Univesity Medical Center.


Next we went to The Cottage at Laguna Beach for brunch.
Tom & Betty McCormick, Tom & Kay Hill, Martha & Fred Greene



Then to Laguna Beach! What a view!

I thought you might also like to see something from the Street Rod Show in Riverside Friday evening.


An F1 Ford! Not quite as nice as ours though!

As I drove to LLUMC this morning, I thought, “What a beautiful day! This is another good reason to have a 6:45 AM time slot!” The sun was coming up behind the mountains and the sky was streaked with multiple shades of a million colors! It was incredible! Isn’t it wonderful to be alive and well and living in America?

I thought of a line from the movie, Return With Honor.

“Every day is a good day when you wake up and the doorknob is on the inside of the door!”

This in not just a “good” day, it is a GREAT day! Thank you Lord for allowing me to experience this! And not just this morning, but I also thank you for this “good gift” of prostate cancer and all that I have experienced through it. Thank you for being faithful to continue to conform me to the image of Christ.

Everyone has heroes in their life and at different times, the heroes are different. The men in the photos below are my “heroes” at this time in my life. They are in Gantry 3 every morning and prepare the room (and me) for the proton treatment. They do this same job every day, over and over (every 15 minutes), yet they always greet you by name and with a smile, and they are cheerful, patient, efficient, and compassionate.

Thank you fellows, my hat is off to you!



Tim Holmes, Bryan Moreno, and Jeffry C. Ferdian

Renato Farias

Today was another busy day! I thought this time in California would be a vacation! It's not! Kay and I are both very tired this evening. I don't know what part of it is from the treatments (if any :-) and what part from the schedule we have been keeping (probably all). My treatment was at 6:45 AM as it has been all week. We then came home and had breakfast and got ready to leave. At 8:45 we left for the hospital again (I am really glad that we are only about a mile away!) because they want you to see the doctor during your second week of treatments. We signed in at 8:50 and actually got to see the doctor at 10:10. There are no appointment times, they just take you in the order that you sign in. We did the usual thing while waiting, we worked on a puzzle. There is always a puzzle out in the waiting room!

We discussed taking "extra" treatments with the doctor. He does not ordinarily recommend doubling up on the treatments. He said that there can be additional side effects and you don't have them until later, maybe months later. He also said that they don't like to "double up" until after you have completed at least half of the treatments so they can see how you are tolerating them. But, since I get my treatments at 6:45 AM, maybe I could take an extra one on Friday night and I would have two days to recover before Monday AM. My doctor will be gone the next three weeks so I will discuss it again with an alternate doctor next Thursday. Dr. Luu said that he would talk to Dr. Jobola before he leaves on vacation. So much for that "bright idea" (but I haven't completely abandoned it!)

At 10:30 we came back by the apartment and then left for Costa Mesa. We arrived about 12 Noon and had lunch with the staff and some attendees at the CF! Business conference there. After lunch I meet with the attendees and answered questions for about 45 minutes. Then the drive back! This makes four roundtrips to the Irvine/Costa Mesa/ Santa Ana area in seven days! No wonder we are tired! :-)

On the way back we had a new experience, we stopped at a Trader Joes! My second cousin, Brian Hunter, manages a Trader Joes in Chicago and we have wanted to see one but there are none in Oklahoma! For those of you in OKC, it kind of reminded me of a "new" Kamp's!

Tomorrow Tom and Betty McCormick arrive from OKC and we are looking forward to spending some time with them. We may even go "26 miles across the sea" where "Catalina Island is waiting for me" this weekend!

It seems that 5:45 AM comes earlier each day! None the less, we were at the hospital about 6:05 AM this morning. There is a whole new group of people to get to know, the early morning bunch. They are different from the night bunch but still a lot of fun to be around. Anyone that knows Kay and me knows that we are not early risers! But, there are a couple of good things about a 6:45 AM appointment. First, they start at 6:00 AM with the first appointment so if the synchrotron and gantry are working, they are still on schedule at 6:45 AM. :-) Second, it leaves the entire day open to accomplish other things. So, I pray that I will be able to retain my 6:45 AM time slot!

I was scheduled to speak to 350 8th graders at Hewes Middle School in Santa Ana today at 2:00 PM. I pretty well knew what I was going to say, but, I was concerned about being able to relate to them and being able to deliver a coherent message with meaning in 10-12 minutes. Until last night at 8:00 PM! It was as if God completely changed the direction and content of my talk. So...I wrote a new talk, working on it until 10:00 PM last night and again this morning until time to leave for Santa Ana.

We arrived in Santa Ana about 12 noon and had lunch with Dr. Leo Cummins and Barbara Trainer, the co-sponsors of the student Toastmasters Club. At 1:45 PM we arrived at the school and at 2:00 PM the students started to arrive. Also in attendance were Fred and Martha Greene: Peggy LaDow (Martha's good friend): John Burnett, OKC CF! Trainer; Leo Lozano. Orange County CF! Trainer; and a Tae Kwon Do instructor that introduced CF! to Dr. Cummins.

I am happy to report that the talk went well and the timing was perfect. After the talk, three girls came up and said, "Mr. Hill, we just wanted you to know that yours is the first talk that we have ever listened to. You said things that had meaning for us."
Praise the Lord! Isn't He good!


John Burnett, Leo Lazano, Tae Kwon Do Instructor, Tom Hill, Kay Hill


Tom being greeted by the officers of the Toastmasters Club

Tomorrow is another big day. Treatment at 6:45 AM, my first appointment since my treatments started around 9:00 AM with Dr. Luu, and then back to Santa Ana to speak at a Character First! conference being held by Leo Lozano and John Burnett.

I slept better last night. I guess that I was a little apprehensive Sunday night about the time change for my treatment and I didn't sleep well at all! That is a nice way of saying I was "anxious." Of course Philippians 4:6-7 says, Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Yes, I know that verse and the next one too.
Taken from Psalm 34, I prayed to the Lord and He answered me, freeing me from all my fears. I cried out to the Lord in my suffering, and He heard me. He set me free from all my fears. Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those that trust in Him!
Of course I'm not suffering. I specifically chose this treatment for it's effectiveness AND its lack of side effects. But I know that the Lord is teaching me to trust Him in all things!

We appreciate each of you and and your concern for us and especially your prayers. We are "surviving" on prayer.

We purchased some flowers last week to "liven up" the front of our apartment. And it did, in more ways than one! As we returned from my 7th treatment about 7:15 AM, we noticed that some of the flowers were "missing" and more were severely damaged. Upon closer examination, we discovered a dozen or so snails feasting on our flowers! Well, I tossed them over the rail and we went to Home Depot to buy some snail and slug bait. Some locals there said the snails were worse this year than ever before. We were also advised that we could put some beer (or any other alcoholic beverage) out in a pan and they would be attracted to it, drink it, and the alcohol would kill them. If so, that may be the first good use for beer that I have found in 62 years!


This is the front of our apartment at Loma Linda Springs.

My treatment today was at 6:45 AM. There was no receptionist and we each just went back when we thought it was time. Things seemed to work OK without her!

At first the tech said that my treatment tomorrow would be at 11:45 AM. After my treatment he returned and said that 6:45 AM would be my permanent time. Guess we will see!

Yesterday we went to Irvine and to lunch at Mimi's with the Greenes; Martha, Fred, Lindsay, and Allison (Kay's sister and family.) Kay received a beautiful picture of all our grandchildren from our children. What a blessing! We love them so much and are so proud of them! We know it requires a lot of time, effort, coordination, and preparation to take the picture. Please accept our sincere thanks and deepest gratitude for all you do to make this happen! We show it to everyone!

As I drove to my appointment this morning I was overwhelmed with gratefulness that I live in America and have access to such an incredible medical system. Here in America, I am able to research and determine the treatment I believe to be best and then I am able to receive it! The proton treatment center here cost over $40M to build 15 years ago. The replacement cost today is over $100M. And here I am, a nobody, receiving treatment from this incredible machine. Tell me of another place in the world like America! There is none. We should be eternaly grateful to the Lord for what he has given us and because of our love for Him we should use our resources, including our health, to reach the world for Christ.

Today is Saturday. Since Loma Linda University Medical Center is a Seventh Day Adventist hospital, optional services (library, gym, some stores) shut down about 4:00 PM Friday and reopen Sunday. As a matter of fact, since this is a SDA community, they don't deliver mail on Saturday but they do on Sunday! SDA's are vegetarians so all the food in the hospital cafeterias and the student union cafe is vegetarian. Lots of tofu and soy products.

I received my fifth proton radiation treatment last night at 7:00 PM. "Newbees" are low on the seniority list so we have little or no say about our time of treatment. Some fellows have had a different time each day but my times have been consistently in the evening at about 7:00 PM. I have requested an early morning time and was told they would fit me in when they could. As men finish their treatments and leave, it opens up spots in the schedule and they move treatment times according to seniority and requests. I was told last night that my treatment Monday would be at 6:45 AM so we will see if that is my new time or if I get switched around next week.

I ask for an early morning time for several reasons. 1. I want to go home a couple of times and that would allow me to leave midmorning on a Friday. 2. If you miss a morning treatment, they can usually fit you in in the evening (that may be why I have a early treatment Monday, somebody else may have gone home this weekend) which means I may be able to return from OKC on Monday and get a treatment that evening. 3. The minimum time between treatments is 7 hours. I am thinking that if I have an early orning time I might be able to slip a second treatment in during the evening. If I can do thet 5 times in 8 weeks, I could finish a week early!

Kay and I climbed the hills behind the apartments again today. This time we climbed almost an hour before we turned around. We went to the top of the highest hill/mountain. We saw two snakes on the way up! I don't think these were rattlesnakes. Each was about three feet long and only about the size of my thumb. My limited experience with rattlesnakes is that they are pretty "fat" compared to their length. Again I threw rocks at them and they didn't move. While Kay and I were looking for more rocks and the first one dissapeared! I got a stick and poked at the second one and it zipped off into the grass!

It was a cooler, overcast day so Kay and I decided to climb the hills/mountains behind our apartment complex. It appears to be a preserve of some kind and there are lots of trails where motorbikes and 4-wheelers have been. The grass and weeds ate about waist high or more on either side of the trail. About 15 minutes up the trail, I spotted what appeared to be a log up ahead. I slowed a little and when I was about 25 feet away, I realized it was not a log, it was a snake! I think it was a Western Ratlesnake about 4-5 feet long and about as big around as my arm. I threw some rocks at it and it didn't move. I got a little braver and moved closer and it turned and slithered back into the weeds. It had the typical dark brown coloring and five or six dark rings around the tail and then about four or five "rattles." I didn't get close enough to get exact measurements! Needless to say, we were a lot more alert as we proceeded! We continued to climb for another 15 minutes before we turned around and came back.
When it is clear, you can see the entire valley from up there. Unfortunately, most of the time it is very hazy.
My treatment was at 6:45 PM today. Unfortunately they were running late and it was about 7:45 before I started and 8:00 before I finished.
Still no side effects and no "feeling" during the treatments. I am still amazeed!

We continue to "set up house." Seems like every day there are things that we need that we don't have. We make lists and then shop when we are out. There is a "pantry" at the hospital where proton patients leave things when they finish treatment and you can "borrow" and use whatever they have available while you are here. Kay and I haven't visited the pantry yet.
We desire to make this a profitable time so we started Rick Warren's "The Purpoae Driven Life" today. We plan to cover one of the 40 chapters each day of treatment.
They have a proton patient "encouragement meeting" each Wednesday at 5:30 PM. There were about 200 patients and spouses there tonight! They have a light snack, tell about upcoming events, get a final report from those that are finishing treatment, introduce the "newbees" and let them tell how they got here, and have a speaker about every other Wednesday.
It was amazing that most of the men told how they had been specifically led here by the Lord and gave glory to God for what was hapening in their lives. It was an encouraging but long meeting (3 1/2 hours!)
I left the meeting at 6:30 for my treatment. Gantry 3 was about 30 minutes behind schedule tonight. I returnrd to the meeting about 7:45 PM.
It continues to amaze me that there is no "feeling" to the treatment. You lie there and the "beeper" goes off and you are finished. You get up and resume whatever activities you want. What a blessing to not be sick, nauseous, burned, or tired! I continue to be grateful to the Lord for leading me here.

We attended the "orientation" session conducted by Gerry Troy today. It usually starts at 10:00 AM and runs until 12:30PM. Today it started late and finished late, about 1:15 PM. I was glad we attended. We learned a lot about the hospital and the proton facility, toured the gantry, and heard a "layman's" explanation about how the Synchrotron Accelerator works and the history of the Proton Treatment Center. We also saw an old "modulator," an "aperture," and a "bolus." The orientation is designed for patients and caregivers so it is not very technical but is very good.

About 4:00 PM we went to the Drayson Center (the University athletic center.) They have a .1 mile indoor track and a .5 mile outdoor track, weight rooms, exercise rooms, handball courts, and an olympic pool. We walked/jogged 2 miles.

We arrived about 6:30 PM for my 7:00 treatment and gantry 3 was on schedule. I looked at the clock when the techs left the room and it was 7:00 PM! Every thing went smoothly and we left about 7:15.

Kay and I drove to downtown Redland, CA and had dinner at Las Brasas Mexican Restaurant. It is in a very old building with high, tin tile ceilings. The food was excellent! They serve several authentic Mexican dishes as well as a number of vegetatian dishes. I had Posole!

Day 1

Our appintment time at the Proton Treatment Center was 9:30 AM on Monday. I believe they said that all "newbees" normally start at 9:00 or 9:30 AM on Monday.
I remembered from our orientation last week that I was supposed to drink two glasses of water 30 minutes prior to the treatment time. So, just to be safe, we arrived 30 minutes before the appointment time. It was a good thing, you are supposed to arrive 30 minutes early and check the schedule and then drink the 16 ounces of water. Usually they are on time but sometimes they are running late and you don't want to drink the water too soon or you may have a hard time holding it!
I was assigned to gantry 3 for treament. Gantry 3 is all prostate patients. They have three gantrys with moveable radiation heads and two with fixed heads (one for eye and nervous system tumors and another for research.)
About 9:20 AM a technician arrived and took me to the changing room. There are two lockers with keys on wrist bands, you remove all your clothes (except your socks) and put on a gown. They usually have one man in the gantry and one waiting in the changing room. If a locker is not available, you wait for the man in the gantry to return and you are then second in line. When the man before you returns, you proceed to the gantry for treatment.
The gantry is just across and down the hall about 30 feet. The entry is an "L" shaped hall that is probably designed to slow down the proton radiation that may escape. The gantry is like a "Star Wars" room. I wil try to post a picture later.
You climb into your "pod" on the table and they tell you to roll to your left side. They then insert the baloon and fill it with two sringes of water. You then lie on your back and the technician adjusts your body to "level" by positioning the bones of your hips relative to the pod. The icture below shos me in the pod in gantry 3.
Next the technician inserts the "modulator," the "aperture," and the "bolus" into the radiation head. All are "bar coded" and a bar scanner is used to record and check to insure all the components are correct for you. The gantry is then rotated 90 degrees so the beam enters your body from your side. The radiation treatment is alternated from one side to the other from treatment to treatment.
Before the radiation treatment begins, an MD checkes the settings and signs off on the treatment.

All the techs leave the room. You hear a door close and the beginning of a "whiring" sound which I later discovered to be the "modulator" wheel starting up and spinning! It takes about 10 seconds for it to get up to speed but it may be aa long as 60 seconds before the radiation starts. The only indication you have that the beam is on is the radiation monitor in the room beeps. It "beeps" about 27 times in 60 seconds and the treatment is over.
The techs return, one removes the water from the balloon and then removes the balloon. The techs schedule the treatments so they tell you the time for the next day's treatment and you leave the gantry. You return to the changing room, dress, and your treatment/appointment for the day is over.